Even when we feel inadequate
By the grace of God, I passed my ordination test. It took me in total of 3 years and 6 months
to go through this process. And let me tell you, it was so much worthwhile for me. the reason
why it was worthwhile was because God taught me that His calling was not based on my merit
or my strength but based on His decision and His will. His calling was not because I am deserved
to be a pastor but actually, I don’t deserve to be a pastor but God still called me to show who
He is through my inadequacy.
God called Abraham and promised him that He will bless him abundantly. It was not because
Abraham was a great person or a great man of God, but because it was God who called him.
Moses lived 40 years in the castle as an adapted son of a princess in Egypt and murdered an
Egyptian man when he tried to save an Israelite. Then he ran away, lived another 40 years tending
the flock that belongs to his father-in-law. Moses was an 80-year-old man who did not even own
a single sheep of his own. He had no dreams or future for God’s glory, but one day, God called him.
God used Moses so greatly. God trained him so much as a leader. It seems like it was totally
impossible for him to lead the entire Israel out of Egypt. He even said, “No, thanks!” to God when
He called him, but God still used Him.
When I see each and every single one of you, and when I see this church, especially EM, sometimes
I don’t see a good future. Why? It’s because of your leader, me. I feel so inadequate. But after the
ordination test, God has changed my heart. This church has a greater future, and it’s because of our
Lord Jesus. He is leading us. He is leading every single one of us. Even when we see some differences
and even pride, I strongly believe God will lead us through.
So that’s why, I have decided to pray for you. Since I trust in His sovereignty to call us to grow in Him,
I have decided to kneel and pray to Him for this church. Because every single one of you is God’s beloved
child and one day, He will use all of you as shepherds to lead people to Christ.
Let’s pray together in your own rooms, cars, work and even in your workout sessions. Let’s trust in
Jesus that it is not because of our goodness that we are saved or even grow, but it is God’s goodness,
calling, grace and love that leads us today.
“I know that you have little strength, yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name.” Revelation 3:8
Neal Lee
Thank you. You did a great job!